Old the tome, dust floating breeze
the rattle rushing through the trees
the faintest whisper that bit the lip
the eyes that blink, the hands that slip
The steps that quicken down the path
the brow that furrows in reddest wrath
the prayer that falls on deafened ears
the lie that binds us through the years
The plea that needles in the brain
the roads washed out by winter rain
an echo in the empty hills
the shadow cast on window sill
Same the way that lights the hall
the foaming mouth that shouts the call
the feet that rasp and drag the street
the claws that clutch the dripping meat
The tongues of flame that pierce the night
the teeth that gnash, the nails that bite
the wasted, beaten, broken breath
in jagged gasps it begs for death
What is past is past
What is done is done
All eyes focus
On the vanishing sun
but now we are at the turning of the year – the sun is no longer vanishing but starting to grow in strength once more. As we are.
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Indeed. Quite the magic trick.
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you’re one of the few who can keep me reading with rhyme. your rhythm was perfect. also, the imagery was progressively fiercer. i love gripping pieces like this.
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I’m glad the piece kept your attention. Many thanks for reading and the kind comment.
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WoW! Not sure if i adore this or am frightened and confused. ~~dru~~
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Oh, don’t be frightened. 🙂 Thanks for reading.
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Wonderful imagery
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Thank you, Derrick
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I liked the structure of the first and thirteenth lines–the way they begin gives them emphasis. It’s a bleak piece, to be sure, but it’s chock full of memorable images and has a distinctly haunting quality. I find it crosses over between a stark reality and a mythological space. Totally compelling and the rhyme is interesting because it gives it a classical tone. Bravo!
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We are crossing over between a stark reality and a mythological place right now. They like rhymes better over There.
Many thanks for reading. I always appreciate your comments.
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An excellent piece of writing Oglach.
The feet that rasp and drag the street
The claws that clutch the dripping meat.
The wasted, beaten, broken breath
In jagged gasps it begs for death.
The whole poem flows like liquid
and has great intensity.
Well done Sir.
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High praise indeed, Sir.
Many thanks for reading and your kind comment.
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Another stunning poem. I hear a sound of bodhrán in it.
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Very much so! And it picks up the pace along the way.
Merry Christmas, Inese.
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Merry Christmas to you too, and the best wishes for 2017!
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Fantastic! I shiver from both fear and thrill. I read your poem over and over and still can’t get enough. Powerful stuff!!
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Many thanks, Rose.
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The rhyming, the imagery, both have produced here a very tangible image. As if, the rhythm is becoming faster and faster as it proceeds towards the finality. I loved the onomatopoeic effect.
The sun vanishes because it knows that it will come up again next morning 🙂 Let’s welcome the new sun of the new year. Wish you a wonderful 2017… happy new year… 🙂
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Thank you Maniparna. You always make such wonderful and insightful comments.
May you have all the best that life has to offer in the new year. 🙂
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Thanks and wish you too a great year ahead… 🙂
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You my friend have threaded the needle
Simply beautiful
The Sheldon Perspective
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Thanks a million, Sheldon. Truly appreciated.
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In this time of in-between so many words echo with peculiar meaning and double as magic spells! I am loving your poetry… Mind the spider’s web!
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I think words always double as magic spells….thanks for reading and your wonderful comment.
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I read it, and then I read it again, this time out loud and enjoying simply the sound of the syllables – it’s perfect! Both in its content (powerful, gripping, even chilling a bit) and its musicality (if that’s the right word for it, but I hope you know what I mean). A very impressive piece of art, like lightening in a dark night.
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That is a very kind and generous comment, Sarah. You’ve made my day. Many thanks. 🙂
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You’re most welcome! Have a lovely weekend! 😄
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This was feral. I loved it. Word magic. 🙂
I took a stab at a poem that a couple of the verses here remind me of. It’s called “Birds of Prey.” My poems are still slightly elementary, as I’ve not been trying that long.
This was masterful.
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Thanks very much for reading and the kind compliment.
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This is spectacular in its breadth.
The images,the rhythm,
the precision of it all…
And the last four lines took my breath away with their power.
Bravo poet!
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Your comments mean a great deal to me. You have my heartfelt thanks.
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Wow, this was good. Dark and deep. The end reminded me of a line on the My Dying Bride disk Like Gods of the Sun: “What have we done to kill the sun”. Great disk, by the way.
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I’ve heard of the band but never heard their music. I’ll check them out. Thanks for reading.
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Especially the mentioned disk is amazing, but admittedly not for everyone. You might need to give it a couple of songs to get into the dark beauty of it.
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Wonderful stuff. You are very talented!
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That’s very kind of you, many thanks.
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Believe me, it’s not in my nature to hand out compliments when they’re not deserved! 🙂
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Haha, I do believe you. You’ve got a very interesting and informative site. I knew nothing of Cassidy until I read some of your posts and looked into his book. Shocking stuff. The upside is that my Irish improves with every visit. Thanks again. 🙂
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